This blog is where I escape from reality & is the result of the listening part of me. Oh btw, I dont talk much in real life.

History

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Thursday, 19 April 2018

Do you guys ever meet someone and instantly know they'll be in your life for a long while? Like there's something about them that makes you want to spend your days with them, without getting tired of talking to them every other day, even after the daily 5-hour FaceTime calls. Your go-to person for pretty much everything in your life. The good, the bad and everything in between. Husni's that person to me.

Over the last 2 years, he's always been there. I don't remember a time when he wasn't in the picture. It all started with a "Let's watch X-Men" and the rest is history. Mind you, I had no clue what was going on since I was never a big fan of X-Men and he patiently explained the plot to me while we were watching it. His explanations were never short of brief. Always very detailed, not missing out even a single bit. We talked about so many things that day, despite the fact we never hung out before. I felt really comfortable with him, right from the very beginning.

Funny how now when one of us goes to an event without the other, our mutual friends would always ask for the other. I guess people know how close we are already, and I'm not complaining. Haha.

Some days when I'm not really up to anything I'd go over to his place just to chill and watch some YouTube or TV shows. On days when we meet and barely even talk, knowing he's there is enough for me. He always has something on his plate, busy man that he is, and that includes having to entertain me lol. Sometimes I'm afraid he's tired of me being too present in his life since he's never not complaining about it but heh, I'm not really sorry. I know he enjoys it too. :p

He can be so mean too? Ugh sabar je lah haha. I guess sometimes he's had it with my bullshit and being the straightforward person that he is, he'd just tell me. But I'd still annoy him any day lol.

And on days when I don't feel so good, just talking with him about the most random thing can instantly make me feel better. He'd just be blunt and sometimes the things he says can take me by surprise but I know he's trying to help.

I'm forever thankful for him. Feeling so so lucky that our paths crossed.

Thank you for sticking by, Husni. I'm sorry if I've ever been too much for you to handle. Happy 21st birthday. I hope you like your present. Love you long time, best friend.

my fav picture of us <3
(that was taken in Italy 2 days after my birthday???)

p.s. I'm not sure if you read my blog, but I'm posting it here just in case

Thursday, 8 March 2018

I haven't been feeling very good. I guess it's that time of the term. Nearing the end, things always get so draining that I don't have the will to go on anymore. I tried to stay positive but I guess staying positive requires energy too. And God knows how little of those I have left.

I don't remember it being this bad last year. Maybe it's due to the fact I got involved in a lot of different things this year that I become so exhausted. My body aches for a break. I haven't been able to properly take care of myself lately. Every time I tried, I just get so overwhelmed by the amount of work required to even start. I tried taking it one day at a time but everyday it gets harder and harder. I'm anxious all the time. I have things to look forward to when term ends but even those seem far-fetched. The things I used to do to cope don't seem to give me much joy anymore.

These days I'm just telling myself there's only so much days left. But then after term ends does it get any better? At least I don't have to force myself out of bed every morning just to find myself crawling back into it at 4pm.

Ahhhhhh everything's so hard. I just want to shut down.

Also, I'm putting this here so I'll remember to check it out once in a while. I randomly found it on Facebook so thank you to whoever who shared it.


Black Moustache