This blog is where I escape from reality & is the result of the listening part of me. Oh btw, I dont talk much in real life.

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Wednesday, 13 July 2016

The other day, a "friend" of mine called me out for being a "playboy", just because I have "so many" ex-girlfriends. Words in quote marks are words that I don't even know what they mean. I got very upset because (1) it came from someone who has known me long enough that he wouldn't have spat that in my face, (2) I don't even know if it's true, (3) it got me deliberating each & every step I'm about to make regardless if it involves dating or not, and (4) I've never played with anyone's feelings for my own good. As far as I'm concerned, it was my feelings that got hurt so many times before.

I may come across as someone who has had a number of relationships in the past few years, but I don't think I'm a playboy. If there's anything that I won't toy around with, it's people's feelings. I know how much it hurts, trust me. I know for a fact too that exasperated people would go a long way in seeking vengeance.

I'm really honest when it comes to relationships. I'll make it crystal clear about my intentions, & I won't mess around if I feel like we are actually going somewhere. However, if at one point or another I don't see a future of us together then I'll call it quits, as simple as that. I mean, why waste time on someone when it doesn't feel right? It's not my fault that things don't work out or if they're simply not the right one. I'll look for someone else who attracts me in a different way.

Another thing is, I may take time to move on from a person, because I tend to lose myself in love. But then once I find someone who interests me, I won't delay on getting to know them. Is that considered a playboy, "friend"?

I feel like being young is the time to make mistakes, experiment on things we think we like which often will turn out to be the things we actually can't tolerate & keep searching for the one. I guess that's why I'm so hooked on How I Met Your Mother - because other than the fact that Barney Stinson is an out-of-the-world asshole, I relate so much to Ted Mosby. We're both looking for the one & are kind of hopeless romantics ourselves too.

Whatever it is, I have faith that the right one will come along. I just need to keep searching. If by looking for the right partner in a pool of wrong ones makes me a playboy or a serial dater, then be it.
Black Moustache