This blog is where I escape from reality & is the result of the listening part of me. Oh btw, I dont talk much in real life.

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Friday, 31 March 2017

Friendship is such a tricky thing. To think after 20 years of living and 5 years of being in a boarding school where you pretty much deal with hundreds of diverse personas 24/7, one can hardly escape from thinking that they've covered every possible scenario in the arena of friendships & foes, & that they're ready to take on whatever kind of people that would appear in their life afterwards. Boy, is one really wrong.

I'm beginning to believe that most, if not all, of the friendships I've built around me have their expiry dates. It's just a matter of time before a particular friendship fades away, be it because of stupid me not being able to make time to reply to their WhatsApps, not liking their Instagram posts (millennials), or simply because we don't talk for too long a period that it became awkward.

I don't find myself spending too much time on social media nowadays, or rather interacting with people online. It doesn't matter if I really have nothing to do and have stayed in bed all day, I would choose some other things to do [read: Netflix] than scrolling my Instagram feed. I do go on Instagram when people tag me on a funny post or DM me but generally, I don't find myself craving to keep up with what the people I follow are up to. Twitter, on the other hand, is the place for me to keep up with the latest memes and M*lei dramas. I tried to quit Twitter but ALL THE NEWS ARE THERE so I just made one for the sake of knowing what's up with the world and what goes on back home.

I guess doing that social media cleanse last year has done me some fair share of good and bad. The good being me not finding myself too caught up with other people's lives and being very particular about my posts and captions and whatnot to the point it drained me of energy. The bad being me basically turning into just some eyes behind the screen. My eyes see, but my fingers don't react to what I see. I simply digest and keep the thoughts I have to myself. I even think at least 5 times before sending out a Tweet.

Ok, I think I may have gone a bit off topic. I wanted to talk about how I think I've drifted away from my friends back home. I talk to only a handful and truthfully, I miss them. I guess this is the price to pay once you decide on studying thousands of miles away from the people you love. It's not that I don't want to talk to them, but it's been too long that I don't know where to even begin. Funny how a few months ago all that "I'll never forget you" "We'll keep in contact" etc bullshit were liberally thrown around.

Admittedly, I haven't been doing a good job on my part, but then I realise they don't make the effort too. So what does that say about both ends of the friendship?

Maybe it's just me overthinking stuff I shouldn't be overthinking about, but I miss my friends. I can't wait to go home to them. I need to find some sort of affirmation that friendships don't have expiry dates.
Black Moustache