This blog is where I escape from reality & is the result of the listening part of me. Oh btw, I dont talk much in real life.

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Thursday, 27 July 2017

Have you ever gotten yourself in a messy situation and have nobody else to blame for you being in that situation but yourself? That sucks. Especially because at the moment you thought it was the right thing to do but now you're starting to doubt your hasty decisions. And now you're stuck at a crossroads.

Here's the thing; I'm in love with a person who's in love with somebody else.

And I have no idea how to proceed in this situation. I think I have 2 options:

(1) Do I wait for this person to move on and be there once they've moved on? How much longer do I need to wait then? Will I just be the rebound guy from their past relationship and thus not making it as significant to them as I'd hope it to be? Or;

(2) Do I let this one slide? And move on?

The second option seems to be the more fitting one in this situation as it's clear enough that A (person I like) would not move on anytime soon and is very much invested with B (person A likes) that it would be difficult for me to live up to their past relationship. But at the same time it's not an easy decision to make cause I'm pretty sure with what I want - and that's A. I'm tired of being on the sidelines and having to wait and wonder if this is going anywhere cause simply waiting is not good enough.

I think I'm finally ready for a stable relationship and I'm not going to waste much time if this isn't going anywhere. Then again it's not easy for me to fall for somebody new cause I'm already in too deep and emotionally invested with A.

*sigh*

Why is it every time I let my guards down, it always ends up messy? But I'm not regretting this, though. I really hope I can work this out. I want to do it right this time. I'm not going to screw up the only good thing going on in my life. I feel like it's the right thing to do but at the same time I don't? Maybe I should give it more time? I'm not sure. I've promised myself before that if I'm ever gonna fall in love, there's got to be more than just enough.

Falling in love is tricky. I'm always clueless contemplating on my next move. One wrong move and it could flip the whole thing around. I don't particularly like it, yet there's something comforting about letting yourself fall into the unknown. All I ever wanted to do was knowing what to do. The uncertainty messes up my brain so much.

p.s.: deep down I hope you'd talk about me with as much passion as you do talking about him.
Black Moustache